QUE seu nome Brazilian? I know this really neat Brazilian football name generator X has been flying around cyber-space for a while but I have been too busy practicing my diving and fine-tuning my feigning of injury to play with it properly.
But I spent a few thoroughly enjoyable hours toying with it today to find the perfect World Cup winning name for the back of my shirt. The samba superstar moniker machine is simple but brilliant. It takes a recognisable syllable from your name and gives it a strong Sao Paulo accent and a cultural transfusion to produce an evocative name fit to line up alongside Pele, Jairzinho, Socrates, Zico, Juninho and, er, Doriva.
My real name becomes Vickinhosa. Vic as a first name threw up Vickinho and the hated 'Tony' led to Tinho. The blog name produced Untypicao which has a certain ring to it, and as the site produces a user friendly little 'your name here' graphic of a shirt I gave it a number 6, printed it out and whacked it on the pin board along side Juninho holding the cup aloft at Cardiff and a Gazette cutting about the Sex Pistols' secret gig at the Rock Garden.
But what about our heroes? How do Boro look like rebranded as Brazilians?
I put the team that played Sevilla into the mix to give them a bit more flair and it produced some interesting results, not least the revelation that James Morrison would be called Jama over in Rio - which is exactly the same distillation of his name that he got in the school playground in Darlington.
You need to jiggle the names a bit to get just the right feel. Using different bersions of a name made a big difference in the results, for example Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink produced Flinhosa while Jerel became Jeresca. And when the results were a bit dull I tried again using terrace nicknames so instead of Cattermolisco we got Supresco (which I immediately copyrighted and am currently trying to sell to a prominent supermarket chain.) Schwarzer generated, well, Schwarza. But a little rejig and we got Kellinho. I'll leave it to you imagination as to who produced the Brazilain names Donkinho and Owngoaleo.
The selecao:
Kellinho
Stua
Rigginho
Gatescao
Frisco (Frank)
Jama
Fabito
Georgisco
Stewinho Peres
Mildo (Viduka)
Flinhosa
Subs:
Yakubeto
Supresco
Gladinho (Maccarone)
The boss: Gaffeca
I tried a few names and phrases that we could maybe put to Doriva as deed poll possibilities if he is to get a new contract. Holgate End became Holgatilda and Chicken Runner gave us Sa Chickao. Then there are Wilfetta, Ravaldo, Slavesco, Mogginho, Gibsaldo and Giroldinho. I think I am going to change my name.
It is a stroke of genius and it is no surprise that it has racked up 800,000 hits in just ten days. It has crashed countless times and been shifted to bigger servers half-a-dozen time as it struggled to cope with the volume of traffic. I can't get on it right now. It is well worth waiting for.
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