Boro Shock Swoop For Right Winger

AV

Would that include being at the heart of what Swansea did going forward (nowt) against Boro when we tonked them 3-0 on their own patch early in the season? I was at that game and I don't recall being desperately impressed but, to be fair, it was before they got into their stride and before we started stumbling.

Even Marvellous Marvin scored in that one!

Seriously - leave aside the undoubted footy attributes, Britton also has some 'complications' in his private life that it has been suggested have disrupted the latter part of his time at Swansea and might see him want to be closer to London than either Teesside or Wigan. We'll see.

I'd understood that Jaguar were continuing as 'official car sponsor' (whatever that entails) rather than shirt sponsor - though I'd love it if Boro were to have the big cat on the shirt (despite the unfortunate links with the Corus issues).

White band of some description? Defo!! I take it that, of the three on show, the top two are the nearest approximations in the Adidas catalogue and the other is something more bespoke and clumsy.

Of those three, I prefer Mock up 2 but - if something more bespoke is on the cards (has to be doubtful) - it must surely be possible to do a better job than the example shown which has the same design values as the 'letraset' badge.

**AV writes: I thought Britton was good in both games. He was always looking for the ball and was comfortable in possession and played some neat balls. And I liked Darren Pratley and Ashley Williams too. I don't know about complications.

A quick internet check on Leon Britton shows that he's only 5'6" and hasn't scored a goal for nearly 150 games over three years - since we already lack goals and physical presence in midfield then I'm afraid as far as little Britton goes - then the computer says no.

Also I believe that former FA chief Lord Triesman was trying to explain the merits of the Screwfix idea to a lady companion - but unfortunately it was misunderstood and resulted in him having to do the honourable thing for English football.

One thing we will have is the smallest wall when facing free kicks, Britton 5'6'
Flood 5'5', Arca 5'6, McDonald 5'5'. We could create a record for the smallest wall in history but then on Corner kicks,we will just grab the legs and let Wheats out jump them all. You cant make this stuff up ... or can you?

Aaarggh! Not another pint sized midfielder. The Championship requires big, tough tackling midfielders. We already have enough Dicky Dancers.

AV

If Britton were to come in then I'm not sure I could see him and GON in the same team - much too similar in the roles they both prefer. But maybe that's a clue.

Complications?

'Britton has also previously admitted he has been unsettled by the turmoil of his recent split with his daughter's mother who has moved back to his native London.'

Recently in the South Wales Evening Post and the Beeb Wales site.

I agree about Ashley Williams. I'm less sure about Pratley. If he added ten more goals a season to the rest of his attributes then maybe.

With the relative strength of their defence and midfield there's a reason they scored many fewer than the others in the top echelon and the last thing we need in a squad restricted for numbers is another non-scoring striker.

AV said: "....assuming he doesn't buckle under the "tested to destruction" boot camp regime at La Manage, where he will no doubt be placed ominously in the feared Group 3, the lardies and lightweights punishment detail."

LMAO!

Would you agree that the teams that finish at the top of the league pay the highest wages? Look at Man Utd and Newcastle this year. Surely the best players should be paid the most.

Would you agree that the teams that have the most support are able to pay the highest wages? So it was interesting to see that Boro’s average attendance puts us 10th in the attendance league. And of course we finished 11th. So we are hardly a big fish in this division. In fact looking at the attendance of Blackpool it shows how well a club can compete if ran well and the transfer and wage policy is well researched and coupled with some dynamic management.

However Blackpool will have very little room to manoeuvre should they not win the play off final. The best players will have to be sold. Of course they will have some money to spend but paying large transfer fee’s usually means large wages which they might struggle with.

So there really is a good opportunity for Boro to become one of the bigger players in this division. If we could get average crowds of 22-23 thousand then that would make us a much more attractive proposition. Looking at the attendance table you can already predict teams with a better chance than most of the top six, The unmentionables, Sheff Utd, Derby, Leicester.

Now is the time to ask, not what can the Boro do for you but what can you do for the Boro.

Any waiverers out there, come on get that season ticket, come to the first home game, re-arrange your holiday plans and bring the family over from Finland, Canada, the USA or Australia. If next season is to be great we have to do it TOGETHER.

Up The Boro!!

I note the irony about wood sizes whether unintended or not but it reminds me of a couple of shop fitters who worked at Sparks bakery when I was there.

They went off to Dickens and asked for four lengths of six foot of two be two only to be informed it was all metric now. Tape measures out to check conversions and they asked for four lengths of two metres of 50 be 50.

The chap in the store solemnly informed them they only sold it in 1.82 metre lengths. Hey ho!

Smog -

Did you ever get any monet=y from that Clifford chap?

In general, I am pleased that we are trying to get players in early - a few out wouldnt go amiss.

Interestingly, after a couple of years of outstanding growth Greggs have announced total sales increased by 2.6% and like-for-like sales by 0.6% in the period to 18th May. maybe they are due a major upturn.

my predictions are we will buy players late Into Pre-season, Strachan will get more stricken(Ginger Keegan) lose the team and get sacked early October by the winless run we have.

If we keep these same players (Lightweights) I really cant see Boro back up In (only when man lands on the moon again which will be never) seasons. I hope Im proved wrong. What will be different this season than last season? Won't see much difference at all. Remember what Gibbo said have Blind Faith - more like come xmas barrr-humbug! Please Strachan prove me wrong!

Some may be aware of the BBC's boro fan and blogger Robbo Robson as per:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/robborobson/2010/05/the_blue_meanies.html#comments

But the Beeb (in its infinite wisdom - and in WC year) is closing several footy sites so Robbo is moving to:

http://robborobson.blogspot.com/2010/05/blue-meanies_17.html

Have a look and why not register - its easy and a good laugh - fly the Boro flag with Robbo.

Smogonthetyne Now in Nunthorpe said:

"Any waverers out there, come on get that season ticket, come to the first home game, re-arrange your holiday plans and bring the family over from Finland, Canada, the USA or Australia. If next season is to be great we have to do it TOGETHER."

I support that! We should finally get united (?!) behind the Boro. I am ready to come to the first home match in August. We should get a real 'Bosco Jancovic stand' in existence there!

Up The Boro!!

What about Gavin McCann?

He scored his first league goal for Bolton in a 1–0 victory over Middlesbrough at the Riverside Stadium on 19 April 2008.

Big tick there then!!

GHW -

John Toshack scored goals for fun against the Boro in the old second division plus had good record in the top flight and Europe, wonder if he is available?

I agree with John about needing someone alongside Robson to free him up to play further forward, sort of an Essien.

Watching the play offs shows how important it is to have a strong spine to the team - highlighted by the talking Boro video clips. That means another keeper, centre back - hopefully McManus and striker.

Miller doesnt look up to the task and Killen may not be back. Mido at his bombastic best would be great but we are not going to get it, he is Craig Bellamy without work rate and pace.

One thought that springs to mind is how come other teams can get the likes of Tom Cleverley. Lets us hope that Strachan and co are seeking out that type of player wanting to make their way, real quality and ManU work ethic. Danny Wellbeck is another who went out on loan from ManU though one suspects Fergie junior may be in front of us when he recovers from injury.

In goal the current custodians are both flawed. If only we could blend Jones physique with Coynes organising and presence we had have a top stopper. Another Jim Platt in the making.

Back to the video clips, they tended to reinforce my view that we needed to change but the timing was poor. Most importantly, not changing was not an option.

**AV writes: For the tough midfielder enforcer, water carrying holding role I'd go for Keith Southern at Blackpool. His understated industry helps carry the monopaced Charlie Adam and gives him the chance to shine.

I'm in the white band camp. But what about the change strip ? I've always been a fan of the blue and black stripes with dark shorts, but maybe this season we should go for asomething different - maybe a white shirt with a green stripe ....

About this Jaguar thing on the shirts. Has anyone else thought about it, that Jaguar is a Tata company?

Smog -

I changed the name but the damn system has stored it again, hopefully this will work.

PS - did you get any of the press money? I know I havent, If I were you I would check on the whereabouts of Sir Henry.

AV

Take your point about Charlie Adam, I actually think Robbo is a better player because of his mobility.

One thing that may come out of the 'holiday' in La Manga is a better understanding amongst the squad and coaches about who can do what. A good pre season could see a more settled team but you cannot get around the fact we are some way down the food chain and much of the movement on players may be late in the window.

To be honest, I'd worry about taking anyone (other than Adam) from Blackpool.

Their achievement this season is - of course - laudable and how we'd have loved to swap places. But I also think it's down to a set of circumstances - a particular group of people coming together under a particlar lead at a particular point in time.

I don't think it's repeatable in The Championship (and won't be repeated if they don't go up) or extendable to The Prem (where they'll do worse than Derby if they do go up).

And I think that if you take a player out of their team and transplant them elsewhere we would find that, by and large, when they're not a part of that greater whole any more they'll be less than their fraction of the sum.

To repeat myself from above, we must surely raise our sights to take some from the Prem if we're to have a serious shout next time round.

As mentioned before we must keep the band.

If possible it should be worked into the away kit so when we visit south London for the Selhurst Park CLASH can have a ‘White band in the Palace!’

AV - when counting the Bloggies votes, please take account of the "none of the above" answers (best player, best manager etc). But most of all be aware of widespread electoral fraud being attempted by those adopting multiple personalities on the "vote early and vote often" principle.

And any "Lurkers" putting in their six pennorth to try to mess things up.

**AV writes: I don't think we have any multis, except the Paul Bells.

latest from scotland !!

PETER HOUSTON'S first task as Dundee United's permanent boss will be to fight off a bid from Gordon Strachan's Middlesbrough for Cup Final heroes Craig Conway and Garry Kenneth.

Houston last night agreed a three-year deal with chairman Stephen Thompson that will be confirmed in the next 48 hours.

But Riverside manager Strachan will test the Scottish Cup winners' resolve to hang on to their top stars with a bid for the prized pair.

The former Celtic boss will also launch his swoop for Rangers ace Kevin Thomson -exclusively revealed by Record Sport earlier this month - as he rebuilds his Championship side for a tilt at the English Premier League.

Strachan is also keen on a third United player, midfielder Morgaro Gomis, but is now so confident of landing Thomson in a £2.5million cut-price swoop from crisis-ravaged Rangers that he is focusing on filling alternative positions.

The former Celtic manager will interrupt his holiday today to jet back into Britain for a round of talks with the money men at the Riverside and will urge them to sanction moves for Dundee United duo Conway and Kenneth.

Strachan had been keen on Andy Driver at Hearts but Conway is now his preferred option after watching the winger's man-of -the-match heroics in United's 3-0 Hampden triumph over Ross County.

Strachan is now convinced the 25-year-old would be a smash hit on Teesside, while he sees Kenneth's physical presence as being ideally suited to the rough and tumble of the Championship.

He remains interested in Sol Bamba at Hibs and hopes to lure Celtic full-back Mark Wilson south too along with out-of-contract Rangers striker Nacho Novo who has already been offered a three-year deal.

But Houston, who will be determined to keep his heroes together for a crack at the Europa League next term, said: "The chairman has asked me to become the permanent manager .

"I am thrilled. Nobody has bid for any of our players but we're a selling club and that's the way it is."

**AV writes: FRom our Scottish correspondent

Rumours are that Fulham have bid a 'pre-World Cup £1m' for Sol Bamba. Now for Wigan....

Jarko

The problem with Digard is that if he stays at Boro we pay all his wages, he stays in the treatment room and depreciates rapidly probably leaving on a free transfer.

If we loan him out to a French club they will pay part of his wages, he gets out on the park and we may get something back for him.

I am personally surprised at how fragile he is because he certainly doesnt mind putting it about. Experience shows he doesnt appear to be able to hack it in England.

Following on from the comments about the three groupings in La Manga will the club giving the groups names and/or sponsorship. Groups 1, 2 and 3 dont have a resonance about them.

Group 3 could be sponsored by Greggs or Mothercare. Maybe MacDonalds with Big Mac Meal made extra large for some and Childrens meals for others. Could even have a soft play area where they can get some exercise in a safe environment without getting hurt.

Group 2 could be sponsored by the Liberal Democrats. Their natural sympathies lie with the weak and disadvantaged but they like the idea of clinging to power with the big boys.

Group 1 could be sponsored by the Royal Marines. A mans squad led by Robbocop

**AV writes: Jaguar, Ford, Acklam Car Centre?

Jarko agree with most of that. There is still Bates providing he is fit and stays fit. A very good player if he can stay on the pitch.

Still think we need a keeper as Jones played well when he came back he still had that calamity look about him sometimes.

Mick is a must otherwise we will have to replace or keep Pogi or Riggott both as i said earlier very injury prone to have in a small squad like ours.We still need to replace AJ as our threat stopped when he left.

Always said strikers will be fine if they get the service. So once again agree midfield is where the main money needs to be spent.

I hope Micks situation does not hold us up getting other targets because he wont come cheap.

more from Scotland !

Gordon Strachan is hoping to agree a deal to buy Celtic centre-half Stephen McManus next season – over a round of golf with the Parkhead club’s major shareholder Dermot Desmond.

McManus has been on loan at Middlesbrough, where former Hoops boss Strachan is now in charge, since January and has done well in the Coca-Cola Championship.

And Strachan, whose side narrowly missed out on a place in the play-offs, is keen to secure the Scotland internationalist’s services on a permanent basis.

He normally plays golf with Irish multi-millionaire Desmond during the close season and will use their meeting this year to talk about a price for the defender.

If a figure can be agreed – and Celtic are believed to value McManus at around £2.5m – then Middlesbrough chief executive Keith Lamb will talk to his Celtic counterpart Peter Lawwell.

Strachan is keen to strengthen his squad further next season so they can push for a return to the Barclays Premier League. He said: “We need to win promotion.”

I agree AV that it should not be allowed for those in charge of a club to deliberately create a massive debt that they had no means of ever paying back. Surely that's why accountants exist - to verify that the books of a business are in order.

The data clearly shows the clubs that have regularly been receiving huge revenues from being in the top four of the PL (with the subsequent Champions League cash, plus the extra revenue in marketing from being a high profile club within the world game) are close to two billion pounds in debt.

This means that no club chasing the dream of being a top four club can ever hope to pay their debts off - So any director must know that they will never be able to pay back the money they have borrowed - in fact they will need to borrow even more just to stay there)

Aston Villa are not too far away from Portsmouth regarding wages / turnover ratio - as for Man Utd, they can only clear their three-quarters of a billion debt if they are bought by one of the super-rich.

Apparently the debts are even worse in Spain with £3.5 billion

**AV writes: yes, but in Spain the debt is mainly down to Barca and Real and the regional and municipal governments regulary write off massive chunks of them for political reasons.

And of course 'Kermit' is quite happy that Barca and Real do what they like with just a Gallic shrug in response.

I eagerly await Rijkard Doppelganger's view on this...

The end of an era?

So I see that Riggs is the latest to go through the exit door, turning down a new deal. (Any inside scoop on what he's turned down AV? Presumably a pay cut?).

Anyway, that makes him the last of the UEFA cup final starting line up to leave the club, with only Brad Jones and Bates surviving from the squad for that game. That era well and truly is over now. Perhaps we could have a nostalgic piece linking Boro's rise and fall with Riggott's own?

Anyway, he will be fondly remembered, not only as a classy and intelligent centre back, but a scorer of unlikely and often quite important goals. He always seemed to be quite a nice guy too, and it was a shame that he faded out of the team towards the end.

Anyway, onwards and upwards. McAllister and Blyth have signed on, so we're looking in much better shape for the training camp. Fingers crossed we can get Big Mick signed on, otherwise we begin to look very light at the back.

**AV writes: Our back of a fag packet calculations reckon that his new deal would be something in the region of a £15k A WEEK pay-cut from round about £20k to round about £5k - or even a bit less - and even that might be tied to appearances and Boro's position in the table.

We can't really afford to be offering much more, especially for someone who played five games last season. Don't worry, he won't starve. That is more than decent money in the Championship. Poggi will be in the same ball park

.....why is Minnie on Page 2? Personally I think she'd make a huge difference to morale and be a big influence in the dressing room.

The players based in England I am familiar with but think the Palace players will go to QPR. Can you sort the wheat from the chaff and give any ideas to which players are the realistic targets and which one are not on the clubs radar?

1. J Speroni
2. D Ambrose
3. A Halliday – Signed
4. N Novo
5. K Thompson
6. M Gomis
7. Conway
8. Kenneth
9. Driver
10. Adam
11. S Bamba

**AV writes: I think they are all on "the list" but the first two are more 'possibles' than 'probables' and Kenneth and Driver are on page two.

McManus is off to Spain having cancelled a family holiday.

What do we read in to this?

Well, he is still our player until the end of June so he should be there. Or should he if he is not part of our plans? I dont think Riggott and Aliadiere and M&S (lovely suits young man) are off to sunny Spain.

Is it normal for on loan players to travel on these trips? Honestly havent a clue but I am sure AV does.

Maybe big Mac's missus had planned a fortnight with the mother in law on a remote island near Orkney and views a week of physical torture preferable to mental disintegration.

Or maybe it is a sign to cheer us up to put alongside McAllister and Blyth coming in. McAllister was a footballing midfielder as was Strachan. They could put their feet in but played good football and that is what fans want.

But it is easy to talk a good game, the oproof will be apparent in August.

**AV writes: Generally a loan lasts until the end of the season and I have always taken that to mean the end of the fixtures. A lot of loan deals run out with the last scheduled league game and quite often that means loan players miss out on the play-offs. So I think McManus has already reverted to being a Celtic player.

That he is going to La Manga I see a massive positive sign that he wants to join Boro, that he still accepts Strachan as the gaffer and having the authority on 'workplace' issues and also that Celtic are willing to sell. I can't see them letting him go away with another club unless a sale was quite high up the agenda.

AV - you make an interesting point, about making a contract offer they didn't want to accept. If certain players are indeed offered a contract the club is confident they will refuse then why was Aliadiere told he wasn't going to be offered anything? Why not simply offer him £500/week or whatever it was Riggot was offered? Maybe GS2 was worried Aliadiere would accept anything he was offered!!

**AV writes: With Aliadiere it was not a case of offering a new contract but, similar to the Gary O'Neil situation, whether or not to exercise a two year option on his current terms. They were not willing to do that because there are far better ways to spend £20k plus a week and on those wages he would be impossible to sell.

So according to the Gazette McManus has made a magnificent gesture by turning up for work with the employers who are paying his wages.

Strange, when I turned up for my last month at work with my previous employers nobody said I'd made a magnificent gesture - in fact if I hadn't turned up then I would not have been paid.

Just goes to show that footballers live in a different world to the rest of us.

As I sit in my garden enjoying a drink or two, I'm able to surf the geek on my itod touch thingamy. So when I caught up on young av' antics on Twitter
I watched the new Nike advert.

Call me an old cynic (I am 30) but my mind goes back to fifa's decision last year to seed the world cup playoffs draw. Ronaldo, riberty et Al are now free to grace the world stage and pedal goods made by sweatshop labour in countries that won't be in the world cup . Maybe Lord Triesman has done us a favour

AV, when are you on holiday? You deserve a break after a disappointing season. In the end you were forced to see most games. Must not have been the best season to follow Boro.

Also will uncle Eric call you back after three weeks to see if you're still able write a story or two. So that you can hit the ground running if our season do not starts with fours wins on the bounce... Up the Boro!

**AV writes: I'm off to Rome for a week soon for a much needed break after a very hard season of what seemed to be writing the same things every week. I don't know yet whether to take the lappy to keep levels up or go cold turkey and take my chances in the Eric Paylor back page boot camp when I get home.

"McManus goes to La Manga" - this typifies his attitude, he's a consummate professional whose approach and commitment to the Boro has been exemplary - AND HE'S A LOANEE! Which just goes to show that the importance of character and integrity in modern sport.

His attendance at what I expect to be a Guantanamo type break speaks volumes.
More than any other player I hope he stays.

I have just wasted about 50 minutes watching videos that I presume were to indicate the experts opinions about the coming season. It was impossible to hear what was being said because the background noise was at times louder than the voices of the panel. Surely it would have been possible to find a private room somewhere that did not have people walking in front of the camera

AV, is the Garmin sponsorship contract really up this Summer? Jaguar - Tata company now? No go I think.

I bought a Garmin to my wife as she likes jogging. It's been working fine even though I was worried as our strikers did not find the net. Garmin should have done something there.

I hope we go back to the white hoop - but if GS2 can have a say on that it will be hoops in red and white. But too much like an other NE team I think.

Inter's win showed the benefit of sorting out the spine of your side as well as the value of the coach.

The Italian Champions had the better goalie, central defenders, centre-mid and striker and were coached to know what they were doing and in the way to win. An effective (if not always attractive, despite almost 100 goals in the season) package - and not just in that Final either.

Lessons to be learned. I hope the game was required viewing at La Manga.

Well done to Blackpool too. But, I can understand Ian not watching. Although Boro finished where they deserved to, I couldn't help the odd thought straying to what should have been, if things had been handled better.

If, as Smog points out, that outcome makes the likelihood of Adam (or indeed anyone else currently in Tangerine) recede to near zero the opposite may well apply to the Cardiff squad.

And there are more of the current Bluebirds who could do a job for us.

Whilst I'm not that sure about Chopra (despite the goals), McCormack or Bothroyd for different reasons and Etuhu is a no-no, Marshall is a decent goalie, McPhail is a good holding midfielder with attitude, Joe Ledley has class and potential and Burke is the sort of all action wide man that Strachs seems to like.

And that's without mentioning Whittingham.

Though they didn't play to their potential at Wembley, there'll be competition for their services, I would think, including from some of the lower half Prem teams.

But despite the imminent sale, the finances of the Welsh capital-ists may well mean they need to sell now that they're stuck in the second tier again.

Some of those players who have had a few years of 'close but no cigar' at Cardiff may also feel that a change of scene is attractive.

What I like in Burnley and now Blackpool reaching the PL is that small clubs can still fullfil their dream. So we should also dream about reaching the Europe again - one day. I trust GS2 and SG will make it to PL one day - hopefully next season. We belong there. And I think we will win a cup or finish high enough to be in the Europe in the next 10 years.

More likely than going to the First div of Football League me thinks. Up the Boro - lets set our target high!

AV - You never watch the video stuff? Sounds a bit like the sportsman's cry that they never read the papers.

**AV writes: I was there so I know what was said. I read the proofs before they go in the paper to check for literal, libels and idiocy. Why would I watch the video too? And where would I find the time?

AV -

Find the time! In between solitiare and hearts on the computer probably.

Now we are getting the Arsene Wenger over the videos - didnt see it.

Maybe it is a President Nixon - there is no Maltby tape.

Next you will be telling us that Wigan are in for Leon Britton.

Smog

I dont think they are in Spain yet, thought they flew out Tuesday sans Journos.

Vic

Having insulted you, any chance of a list of players that are off to sunny Spain. According to reports the Pogmeister is off to another club.

Ingerlund tonight and hopefully a bit of Johnno. Close season is boring.

Powmill said: "As for a holiday ........ who takes care of Untypical Boro while the main man is away? Do we all have to take a holiday? Perhaps that nice Uncle Eric could babysit it for you AV? Maybe Jarkko could be given the keys while you are away?"

That is OK by me IF the Gazette buys me the flight ticket to collect the keys. I wouldn't mind having a holiday in the area carrying the 'lappy' there. I have had a few holidays in Gt Ayton and the moors - beautiful area. I must admit I know only Ayresome Park and Riverside from the city - sorry, small town in Europe. And even the former does not exists anymore!

Close season is boring. Up the Boro!

Have I missed the point but why are the players traipsing out to Le Manga to keep fit. Why don’t they follow in the traditions of the game and form a cricket club if they want to keep fit in the summer. At least then we could comment on a match.

McDonald lbw Tucked up by a big swinger 18
Killen ran out too slow between wickets 12
Robson Not Out 143
Flood bowled, caught for pace 23
Pogatetz rt hurt six by’s off ’head 0
McManus Not Out 52
McExtras 12
Middlesbrough CFC Total 260

O M R W
Arca 6 0 189 0
Robson 6 3 10 4
O’Neill 3 1 25 1
McMahon 5 2 32 2

Is it true that Blackpool players had to train on the beach last summer? And to supplement their income they had to give donkey rides in the afternoon. Jason Euell made a killing!

Last laugh eh!

**AV writes: All this talk of cricket will coax Dormo out his tent, currently pitched in the beer garden of the Slaughtered Sassanach on the Island of Duckworth Lewis

AV

Take the lappy with you? Nah.

There are better ways to square the circle of holiday, family and blog. I know from experience in the Florida Mall and many other city locations around the world.

You ostentatiously leave the lappy at home for 'brownie points' then double up by suggesting a days freestyle shopping in Rome's most stylish areas and look uncomplaining for an hour or two.

You then nip into the Apple Store in Rome on Via Collatina on the pretext of sizing up the new iPad or somesuch(you're going to poo-poo it of course - more brownie points - and the kids will love all the interactive stuff too - and it's air conditioned with seating so your good lady can take the weight off).

Then you log on to your Gazette and Blog accounts from there, knock off a couple of hundred words and Bob's yer uncle!!

Smog - let that be the last mention of cricket on here, please. This is one of the few places at this time of the year that I can be guaranteed not to have to put up with cricket. And the same goes for tennis and golf too. And egg-chasing in the winter.

**AV writes: Sounds like a plan...

Kerrching!!! £1m safely banked.

I can hear wee gordie rubbing his hands from here.

Let's raid the spl

A couple of posters on here apparently would like to favourably distinguish themselves from others whom they consider somehow unworthy because of a fall-off in frequency and quality of others postings.

Apparently, some of us are under-performing, failing to produce the goods that keeps them entertained, feeds their imagination and stimulates their enthusiasm, by not making the quantity and quality of contributions they've come to expect from a small provincial town newspaper blog that punches above its weight.

Hmmm!

Maybe we just show our shared frustrations differently, "gentlemen"?

To call fellow bloggers "parasites" however, is a bit strong and, frankly, unworthy of the usual quality of blog contribution that appears here! Could it be that the emerging underlying quality of blog posting is following the football offerings on the field?

Even by AV's own professional journalistic admission, it's been more than tough at times to find anything in last season worth blogging about, without deepening the same furrow (when you're in a hole, stop digging!) and finding you're in the same trench as Bernie Slaven! But that's a style choice and a subtlety that seems lost on some.

For my part, I'm not at all apologetic that I haven't met these less than exacting standards. No more than I am contrite for being quite unappreciative of the quality of the football at at the Riverside for the past three or four seasons - something that some appear to not only be prepared to put up with, but somehow try to make a personal comparative virtue out of doing so!

On a more positive note, it's good to bask in the reflected glory of Adam Johnson's full senior England international debut. Well done young man! I've never been your biggest fan, but you just needed the right environment in which to flourish. I make that worth about £142,857 per appearance minute for Boro!

**AV writes: I think the "parasite" remark was a gentle jibe with no ill intent. Generally though it is inevitable on any forum that the most frequent posters become a self selecting visible hardcore and with that comes that old S&T Red Book elitist tendency to lord it over the lowly Johnny Come lately White Bookers who may as well be part-timers. And, of course, regulars from the kop end in the Bosco Jankovic Stand are a class above the rest.

A mixed night on the international front.

Pleased for Johnno to get a run out and the £1m will be most welcome. The drawback is that one suspects he isnt going to South Africa and that his mini cameo was a 'here is a taste of the future' for Adam. Unless he gets a good run out in the next match it is Weaside not the Veldt for Jinky.

Disappointed for Scott McDonald not going but Aussies loss may be our gain as he will get in a full pre season.

As for England I havent a clue how we ent in 2-1 up but the highlight was Drury's commentary on their goal. As Green was a yard and a half into the net with the ball came the comment that it was a close decision and a tone of surprise that the referee had given it.

A 3-1 win or not that was absolute tishe (tosh in past tense or an anagram, I can't remember which).

Now if Downing had been there England would have carried some threat. Gerrard out on the left in his ludicrous bandage looked about as dangerous as Blackadder (I really laughed at the bandage). Rooney looked jaded, grumpy, moody.

Restore Downing Capello while you still have the chance, my curse is developing and getting stronger (see Triesman aka Wallace & Grommit) Mark my words it's going to get worse and it ain't gonna get better.

Nice one Adam - moves like a dancer, caresses, strokes the ball beautiful .........

Bring back Downing or else !!!!

Mr Average posted a long and considered piece defending us "White Ticket" holders (thanks for that analogy) in the face of the uber cyber geeks and their self feeding demand for non-stop posting on the blog.

Of course, while agreeing that I read this blog for AV's quality pieces on many and all things Boro and related: I also read it for the many other lots of considered, insightful and often thought-provoking observations from many Bosco Jankovic stand, Red Book waving stalwarts, but also from anyone who is bothered sufficiently to post.

Oh yes. I forgot one of the key ingredients that Mr Average forgot about is that it is fun, and more than that it is shared fun. Hmm, I suspect something about the word community really does apply here.

I wouldn't don't know the majority of posters from Adam, but I'm pleased to be allowed to join in from from time to time. I'm also happy to take the (jestful) jibe from smogonthetyne about us "occasionals".

But then I again I've read enough of his (and other's) entries over the years not to detect any malice there, just a clarion call to add a bit of something to the debate. I would say that worked, wouldn't you?

We are now seriously into GHw territory.... he must be lurking around here somewhere!

There are those in the Ploated Pheasant who are concerned there is likely to be a fanged, cloak wearing visitor to the village this evening. Hiding in the shadows will be someone whose reflection is never seen.

Time for the NHS Blood & Transplant people (formerly the National Blood Transfusion Service) to visit again, to collect for the NHS. If anyone sees The Count in the area, please let us know via this Blog. We wouldn't want the fully-laden van to be hijacked on its way back.

**AV writes: Dormo puts sitters wide of either post again. The Alves of the blog.

Sad Max

Narrator: My life fades. The vision dims. All that remains are memories. I remember a time of chaos. Ruined dreams. This wasted land. But most of all, I remember The Post Warrior. The man we called "Max".

To understand who he was, you have to go back to another time. When the world was powered by the blog. And the internet sprouted great blogs. Gone now, swept away. For reasons long forgotten, two mighty warrior tribes went to war and touched off a blaze which engulfed them all. Without news, they were nothing.

They built a house of straw. The thundering machines sputtered and stopped. Their leaders talked and talked and talked. But nothing could stem the avalanche. Their world crumbled. The cities exploded. A whirlwind of looting, a firestorm of fear. Men began to feed on men.

On the blogs it was a white line nightmare. Only those mobile enough to scavenge, brutal enough to pillage would survive. The gangs took over the blogs, ready to wage war for a piece of gossip. And in this maelstrom of decay, ordinary men were battered and smashed. Men like Max. The warrior Max. In the roar of search engine, he lost everything. And became a shell of a man, a burnt out, desolate man, a man haunted by the demons of his past, a man who wandered out into the wasteland. And it was here, in this blighted place, that he learned to live again...

Smog: [after someone’s post is deleted] *No!* *No more talk!* We go in! We kill! Kill! We kill 'em! They kill us, we kill them! Kill 'em! Kill 'em! Kill! Kill!

Mr Average: Be still my dog of war. I understand your pain. We've all lost posts someone we love. But we do it my way!

Smog: Losers... losers wait!

Mr Average: We do it my way. Fear is our ally. The Blog will be ours. Then you shall have your revenge.

[Smog passes out]

Mr Average: Take him away.

Mr Average: There has been too much violence. Too much pain. But I have an honorable compromise. Just walk away. Give me your Blog, the IP adresses, the passwords, and the whole compound, and I'll spare your lives. Just walk away and we'll give you a safe passageway in the wastelands. Just walk away and there will be an end to the horror.

[Soldiers start up their Lappys]

Mr Average: I await your answer. You have a full day to decide.

AV: What is it with you, huh? What are you looking for? C'mon, Max, everybody's looking for something. You're happy out there, are you? Eh? Wandering? One day blurring into another? You're a poster, Max. You're a parasite. Did you know that? You're living off the corpse of the blog world. Tell me your story, Max. C'mon. Tell me your story. What burned you out, huh? Post one to many? See too many people post? Lose some posts?

[Max turns to AV and gives him an angry glare]

AV: Oh, so that's it, you lost some of your posts? That makes you something special, does it?

**AV writes: You are charged with pursuing the gangs and cleaning this whole mess up anyway you want.. so long as the paperwork is clean.

So much for the intricate build up with a devastating finish, a la Arsenal. It's back to route one and the 6 yard box toe poke for me!

I just had a happening with my browser and lost a reply I was typing to you AV.
I'll try again, writing off-line first!

Well spotted. I didn't detect the inconsistency of my position in that last post.
I do agree that the flag of convenience is raised far too readily in the international cricket arena. Victory in the Twenty20 while sweet, would have been sweeter still had the team and management/coaches been born within these hallowed shores. And so it will be this summer.

Victory will be sweet for our noble English knights, jousting on African soil, but would be sweeter still if the manager/coach was also an Englishman.

What has happened to our ability to develop top managers/coaches?

**AV writes: I think they get monstered by the tabloids who lead kneejerking mobs against them at the first set-back of their fledgling careers then decide it is not worth the chew and opt for punditry. Is it just a coincidence that the likes of Robson, Hodgeson and now McClaren have had to go abroad and get out of the firing line before being hailed at home?

So what type of passport has Fabio got AV?

England world champions, sounds good doesnt it.

AV

Do I detect a hint of class warfare against those who play cricket?

Despite being a lover of Boro, my love of egg chasing and the sound of leather on willow will no doubt result in my internet browser getting a visit at midnight.

The protestations of my working class roots will prove of no avail against the true brotherhood of the oppressed, I will be exposed as a traitor of the revolution, a mere lackey of the capitalist oppressors. I will stand up to such bullying.

To the tune of the red flag -

'The working class can kiss my ass, I've got the foremens job at last.'

Sorry about that, dont know what came over me. It must have been GHW missing out on his Merc.

**AV writes: Cricket AND egg chasing? You may as well go the whole hog and take yourself and young Araminta Gill-Toffe along to watch the Polo!

Richard

Whilst Mad Max didnt live to enjoy his pension take solace in the fact he enjoyed those of plenty of other people.

**AV writes: Tell me about it .... grrrrr.

I'm in the white band camp. But what about the change strip ? I've always been a fan of the blue and black stripes with dark shorts, but maybe this season we should go for asomething different - maybe a white shirt with a green stripe ....

ed hardy shoes
sabo schmuck